Technical Aids and Tricks Part L

五月 7th, 2012

I have found a great technical aid to open canned staple food, with fish, instant noodles, goulash soup, wieners, Coke, Bed Rull, beer and cider.

The Canpull opener was awarded with a design prize, the unofficial Oscar for household items of all kind.

One reason more for an extensive Rollinator test as I always had ambivalent feelings towards designer parts. From experience, unfortunately modern appearance and functionality rarely fit together.

This is not the case with the

Canpuller and Soda Snap

With one side

dog, cat and human food cans

can be opened tetra easily.

A small plastic nose clicks into the ring-pull of the can so that the Canpuller doesn’t slip off when it is bent for opening. This is working without problems.

Unfortunately the Canpuller doesn’t help against the burning lips if three chilli peppers are displayed on the “devil’s goulash” can. I am currently a little handicapped.

The other side of the award winner is suitable to open beverage cans in record time.

Thus you can pass an opened can of Prosecco to your colleague even after the eight successful test series with hop blossom ice tea cans of which the content was professionally disposed into the gorge.

This can opener is a well-thought-out and functional technical aid.

Source of Supply: http://www.desicare.de

I give to the Canpuller 4,5 out of 5 possible Golden Steering Forks.

Half a steering fork had to be deducted because manual hands-on is still necessary.

Another type of can opener, (see older blogpost).
An ingenious bottle opener, (see older blogpost).

Translator BL

Addendum: Chock Part XIII It’s my fault!

五月 5th, 2012

In my blogpost of 14.04.12 I expressed the suspicion (see older blogpost), that I am possibly a God of wrong deliveries, because I NEVER receive the ordered medication and medical devices.

Yesterday the time had come again, yet again the wrong compresses!!

My e-mail was rather short, but with

Memory picture for the warehouse staff

From the medical supply store I received a reply immediately:

…what should I say, I think the previous e-mail is self-explanatory!!!

The picture is going to be my new background ;) )

I even had your case in our department meeting, your name should ring a bell… I don’t know what else I can do… I am really sorry!

 

Shortly afterwards I received the following e-mail in copy:

Please note the 31 exclamation marks in only 7 sentences.

Hello altogether, AND ESPECIALLY DEAR COLLEAGUES FROM OUR WAREHOUSE!!!!!!

It is not even a month ago that our customer Mr Rollinator took unbelievable 3 attempts to receive his compresses in the usual way!

NAMELY VYLENE COMPRESSES FROM MAIMED STERILE!!!!!!!!!

I don’t know why this is such a problem, but it simply can’t be true that the customer has received the wrong compresses yet AGAIN, especially because I have extra pointed out to you that you should look into the following already packed deliveries!!

I am glad that Mr Rollinator is simply an unbelievable patient person, but I would be FRANTIC!!!! And I seriously mean it!!

I don’t think it is funny, because unfortunately I don’t have any apologies left!

Please RETURN THE GOODS AND SEND THE CORRECT ONES AND CHANGE IT DIRECTLY FOR NEXT TIME!!!!!!

(Original colour of the e-mail, name changed)

Translator BL

Bath Reconstruction Neverending Story (last part for the time being)

四月 29th, 2012

The Stumbling Rock

 

The reconstruction of my narrow pedestrian bathroom to a

Wheelchair Spa

in the autumn of 2008 with the moving of a wall and the installation of an on grade shower was rather nerve-wracking.

Read the older blogposts “Bath Reconstruction Part 1-4″, and decide yourself if the tears come from laughing or crying ;-)

I was already home from hospital for a couple of days when finally the washing basin was mounted.
The reconstruction was virtually finalized after a few weeks already.

There was just one little thing. The new drain of washing basin and bath tub was ailing a little. The water drained off rather reasonably, but after 25 seconds the drain started to communicate in an unknown language with me.

Just like that:
Gurgle, gurgle, rattle, rattle, bubble, bubble and once again.
Sometimes it seemed to call names.

I had a creepy feeling, everybody knows the pipe ghost, the “Moaning Myrtle” from Harry Potter.

After various unsuccessful attempts to “muzzle” the drain pipe professionally by cleaning it with a spiral I decided to visit the pipe ghost with the help of a camera.

Such a film is quite special if you climb through your own drain pipe.
During the reconstruction work a hardly worth mentionable ca. 4 cm x 4 cm small accident happened to the guys, to say a stone got stuck in the drain pipe.

When the gas-water-heating-bath construction-video expert ;-)

told me that the stone can only be removed from my neighbours underneath I was a bit more relaxed.

Then at least they don’t pry open my brand-new bathroom because of the stupid stone.

I felt so sorry for my neighbours that I didn’t arrange the removal of the stone immediately.

Now, 3,5 years later my neighbours have moved out, and the stumbling rock was finally removed.

Currently I don’t miss the “gurgle conversations” in the morning yet. Should I miss them I have filmed a video with the last words of the stone just in case.

Translator BL

Inconceivable…!!!

四月 24th, 2012

Post a comment!!!

I don’t have a description for “this” any more!!!

Translator BL

Special Edition!!

四月 24th, 2012

Aachen : Eintracht

0 : 3

Mission completed, direct repromotion.

The orthosis was helpful!!!

(see older blogpost)


For the championship celebration 2013 I voluntarily put on the orthosis again.

I am still slightly in „repromotion-mania “!
If my neighbour wouldn’t have called and reminded me of an appointment my car still would have winter tyres… well then… never mind ;-)

Translator BL

>

Crazy Flash XIV

四月 20th, 2012

to catch so!!!

Addendum Technical Aids Tips and Tricks XLIX

四月 18th, 2012

I am always happy when my blog is not only read, but if other tips are sent to me as well.

In my blog of 04.02.2012 I described (see older blogpost), how fast the disabled parking permit escapes in the car at forceful braking and vanishes into the ventilation slot of the windscreen.

A citizen from Potsdam involved in the problem has given some thought and developed a

Parking Permit Holder

.
This object is great and is awarded after a long-time test for several weeks by the unbribable (except for fresh nut slices), independent Rollinator test team, with the new founded

Roll-On Innovation Award on the Silver Axis

for technical aids. The parking permit holder is a holder made from Plexiglas in which the conventional disabled or resident parking permits can be inserted.

The holder has a dovetail on the lower part with which it can be put in the much dreaded ventilation slot. Thereby the construction turns upwards, so that the permit clamps in parallel to the windscreen.

The permit thus will be seen very well, but can be removed any time “tetra easily” from the holder.

It is a well-thought new technical aid which is not only functional, but has a reasonable price as well.

For more information see www.parkausweishalterung.de

Translator BL

Chock Part XIII: It’s my fault!

四月 14th, 2012

When I am every 3 months at the beginning of each quarter jumping into the snake pit marked by the sign

“Required medication and medical devices”

I globally put the blame on myself meanwhile. If nothing works out right away despite all my efforts, it has to be up to myself, otherwise it is not explicable to me anymore.

In the novel “The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy” by Doulas Adams there is a truck driver who is always on the road in the rain. Unbelievable… he is a rain god, he just doesn’t know it himself.

It is probably similar with me and my orders of medication and medical devices, otherwise I would have to claim that nobody does his work properly anymore, and I don’t want to be assumptive.

After I paid my 10 €-membership fee every 3 months (translator’s note: as a member of a public health insurance in Germany you have to pay a surcharge of 10 € per quarter for medical consultation) the fun begins. I get a bunch of prescriptions from my family physician, where you can’t expect at 16 positions that everything is filled out correctly. It must be my karma that even the corrected prescriptions include minor errors sometimes.

If everything is correct, the prescriptions are split in two piles, medical devices and medication prescriptions, and then scanned immediately, because I don’t trust myself anymore.

I would like to point out here that I always pretty much need the same stuff.

I place the order of the medical devices per e-mail and attach the scanned prescriptions, and I send the original prescriptions by good old mail later.

For my pharmacy order I use a conventional telephone. The probability that I receive all pills as ordered in the correct quantities and from the correct producer is virtually zero and belongs into the realms of fantasy.

You can’t seriously expect that in a subsequent delivery with 3 boxes on the delivery slip also 3 boxes are included. With 2 boxes still 66% are correct, grade D, passing, okay…

The quantity of pills was correct this time, for a change the delivery slip wasn’t.

Now the delivery guy has put a box of pills in my mailbox which I will return personally today, whereupon I am convinced that I will hold exactly this box in my hands in 3 months time, this is not Aspirin.

Why is it not working, it can only be up to me…

It is not better with my medical devices.

Due to the so-called direct shipments I receive my materials from 4 different deliverers, who honour me with their visit between 10 and 19 h.

The guys always want to put the cartons on my knees and get off, I don’t like this at all. In the evening my corridor wall with all its boxes reminds a bit of the Berlin Wall.

In one of the warehouses they seem to have too much cardboard boxes and filling material. For 4 boxes of compresses and 1 liter skin cleaner they use a box of 60cm x 60 cm. As my friend usually says: Logistics doesn’t have anything to do with logic.

This time it was even the wrong type of compresses, they can pick up their box again, in the meantime it will stand in my way again. Maybe in an act of revenge I will put some old files from my apprenticeship into the box.

I don’t want to get upset anymore and I keep it with Douglas Adams:

I am probably a

God of Wrong Deliveries.

If everything would work out well at once I could certainly take some pills less.

Translator BL

 

Find of the Week

四月 8th, 2012

Advert

Original and unopened item!

A cup of probably still delicious

MAMA noodles

in “Palo-Duck” flavour, still from my pedestrian times, for sale.

I am parting with a heavy heart from this emergency ration!

Because there is no “best before” date on it, the content should still be in an acceptable condition. A must for each gourmet…

The visual deformations of the cup are caused by the momentum.

Product will go for the best offer. In the comment please!!!

Funny which stuff one can find in the store-room ;-)

Translator BL

Happy Easter!

四月 7th, 2012

Have fun with your easter-egg hunt…!!!

New translations: All around my broken leg!

四月 6th, 2012

Click on the picture to read the complete story around my

broken leg!

Now all related blogposts available in English!

Don’t let them get you down

四月 5th, 2012

Who believes that a wheeler would be too small to achieve and change anything should try to spend the night with only one mosquito in the bedroom!

Who will call for the couch in the living room first? ;-)

Assertiveness has nothing to do with size or number of fellow fighters, even if this seems to be the general opinion in some places…!!!

You can assert yourself against anybody and anything, something is always possible as long as you don’t put up with everything.

Hobbits of all nations unite!!!…ok, now the pills are coming through again.

Among us frequent travellers the secret

day-and housefly method

is for centuries a well-tried means to assert our interests against the “sleepers”.

Should the repeatedly applied day- and housefly method according to the principle “bugging, bugging, bugging” not lead to the desired success, it should now be switched to the quite ruthless

mosquito swarm variant

With it the facts of the case will be spread to the various positions. First to the boss of the “sleeper”, then to the boss of the boss, who certainly has a boss as well. The information of the conspirative press swarm might be helpful as well.

In case of the attempt to “sit“ a problem out the sleeper doesn’t have a chance against the wheeler if the latter doesn’t raise the white flag immediately.

To endure something is not acceptable for us “travellers“ and insults our class.

Nobody will get me down any more with my 138 cm total height sitting in the wheelchair. I don’t give one centimeter more, unless I have a flat tyre. ;-)

Translator BL

 

Shinbone fracture possibly last part

四月 2nd, 2012

After another X-ray of my leg it was medically confirmed that from a pure orthopedic point of view nothing stands in the way of walking, jogging and running in homeopathic dosage.

X-rays from 06.09.2011 / 29.09.2011 / 08.11.2011 / 15.12.2011 / 28.03.2012

More fractures are currently not planned.

The only positive aspect from the permanent X-rays since September is that I meanwhile have an inner glow and can use my right knee as reading lamp and headlight for night-time trips.

Translator BL

(Deutsch) Eigude Pranger XV

四月 1st, 2012

对不起,此内容只适用于Deutsch

Chock Part XII

三月 30th, 2012

On Tuesday I was with my wife at the

Farewell Match of the Frankfurt football player Birgit Prinz.

She has been FIFA player of the year several times and scored 128 goals for the German national team. The match was great, but until I got there…

The organisation of a wheelchair ticket directly at the German Football Association (DFB) proved to be quite difficult this time. So far I had made only very good experiences during the women’s world cup (see older blogposts).

After my first e-mail with the ticket order apparently ended up in the digital nirvana, it worked out a little better with e-mail number two.

Well, apparently you have to see it sportingly. Such an e-mail doesn’t harm, but doesn’t necessarily help either…

Now the whole event approached rapidly… 3 or 4 days!

I had not received a confirmation if I can pick up my ticket at the box office until the moment when I hit the road to the stadium.

On the matchday I also tried to find out by phone where I could possibly park my car because my e-mail inquiry wasn’t answered either.

When I drove to the stadium I was hoping that an admission ticket would be deposited at the box-office for me, and the parking thing was still not clarified. I knew about the bad parking conditions there.

At some stage I didn’t care, I picked up my wife and drove directly to the entrance of the stadium. It was quite busy there!

Although I didn’t have an admission ticket, not to mention a special parking admission, the very kind marshals actually found an adequate parking space next to the OB vehicle of the regional broadcast station on which I could transfer easily into my wheelchair. Thanks again from this side.

Why the German football association as organiser of the event didn’t create a designated handicap parking area, they probably don’t know themselves. At least 15 wheelers were in the stadium. Where did they park?

If now no ticket had been deposited at the box office, or I hadn’t been able to buy a ticket, even a weekly dosage of my medication wouldn’t have calmed me down.

I got an envelope at the box office in which not only my ticket, but also a VIP parking admission was inside. A little too late, but as a proper German of course I laid out the parking permit in the car ;-)

 

Then in the stadium I actually would have needed my mountainbike tyres for my wheelchair, because the main stand currently consists just out of small homeopathic pieces and some rocks.

Luckily I had a ticket for the opposite stand, which was there ;-)

It was a great farewell game and I am a little sad that Birgt Prinz is quitting her active career.

When I was back home I read an e-mail from the German football association where all my inquiries about ticket, parking… were answered.

The e-mail was sent at 16:45 h, kick off 18:00 h.

The staff member was already at the stadium at this time as she wrote, and I totally uninformed on the road!!!

What a pity that I haven’t met the lady ;-)

I could inquire at the German football association if they wouldn’t sponsor a smartphone for me so that I can be always up to date online about my ticket status.

Translator BL