As mentioned, even the white orthosis was at some stage finalized, and I left the hospital.
The great thing with this kind of orthosis is that you can bend your leg. Therefore you are quite mobile in the flat because you can sit in your own wheelchair. The leg should be rested in an elevated position as much as possible, which I realize with two flower stools and a cushion. The transfer to bed, shower… is ok.
With the rented
“Tank Wheelchair”,
in which you are supposed to drive with outstretched leg independent navigation even in the flat is not possible for me.
This thing makes no headway, and it doesn’t have hand rim coats either.
Furthermore with this size I would need a new set of furniture after two weeks. A transfer to the bed is very critical even with a second person.
A trip outside with pusher can’t be expected from anyone. At the
It is often claimed that women cannot park and men cannot find the butter in the fridge!!!
I leave this theory uncommented.
After years of intensive studies of human behaviour I came to the statistic, scientifically provable result that women predominantly feel the desire for champagne and wine, whereas men, no matter from which parts of the country they are, can’t resist the temptation of a weiss beer.
The visual similarity of a
weiss beer glass with a Y chromosome
is striking.
I additionally support this theory crystal-clear with the fact that wine and champagne glasses rather resemble an X chromosome.
This evolutionary association is more than obvious.
With this irrevocable fact I strive for reference at the “Royal Swedish Academy of Sciences“ in Stockholm!
After a few months in the hospital you get on rather friendly terms with nurses and physicians.
Of course a little piece of humour belongs to it as well.
If one as quadriplegic (spinal injury in the cervical area) like me can’t use arms and hands in an efficient way any more, spaghetti are not the favourite type of pasta.
One day the nurse came with the lunch, it was spaghetti, put it on my bedside table and was waiting for my comment if he could cut the pasta for me.
He was waiting for the comment in vain. I tried to eat these long objects by myself, have to see it sportingly, luckily I was not hungry…
It was a perfect show!!!
At some time a physician came into the room and watched this scenario with the pasta and me slightly grinning, but didn’t propose to cut the pasta neither, and I wasn’t keen on asking her.
I said to her that next time when the food is spaghetti again I would be motorised. I would only need two tie wraps to fix a fork. But had the suspicion that my milk frother would be a little bit too fast. We both had some fun. She didn’t seriously believe the thing about motorisation.
I only thought: You don’t know me!!!
Have a look yourself, one week later the
9,5 Volt Spaghetti Tetra Fork
About risks and generated injuries please contact your physician, nurse or nearest do-it-yourself-store staff.
Addendum: Construction manual for spaghetti tetra bit by popular request.
Saw a standard fork off and forge it flat. Really flat.
Saw approx. 5 cm off an M6 Allen key and weld it lengthwise to the fork stump. Not to the tine, I know it can happen!!!
Polish the welding seam with a one hand angle grinder. If possible keep a little bit of the welding.
Balance the bit at low speed on a drill press with a rubber mallet like a car tyre. Placing additional weight is not absolutely necessary.
Buy a cordless electric screwdriver with very low rotation speed, otherwise the special fork can be used to whip cream.
Boil spaghetti, and it’s done.
Safety instruction: Don’t start screwdriver with fork brought into the mouth, otherwise only the dentist will be happy.
As wheelchair user I have neglected the subject of rollators or walkers a little bit until now. During my journeys through the depth of the internet I have discovered some especially beautiful types:
Parlour Trolley “Push Me!”
Golf Rollator Type “Get the Ball”
Special Edition “Father’s Day”
Skate Rollator “Schuhmacher”
Special Type “Vettel 80″
My Favourite “Sankt Pauli”
Cleany 3000
The parlour trolley is for sale under a different name.
So many rodents you would have to keep to replace a nuclear power plant. Each animal would have to get through a daily stint of 4 hours in the treadmill. We owe this finding to the British student Peter Ash as well as his
Hamster Elvis
It is driving with its wheel a dynamo (see movie), to recharge Peter’s mobile phone. If this is not a marketing gag Elvis has trotted at least to the output power of 1,3 watt of a recharger.
We wheelchair users can do this as well:
We are spinning the wheel the whole day long.
Should we follow the example of the hamster, mount a generator to the wheelchair and feed the generolled power into the electricity grid?
If we wheelchair users are spinning the wheel together we would be doing something good for the environment day-to-day!
How about the slogan:
Handicap Power, from guaranteed accessible cultivation!
OK, the time has come now, you can institutionalize me!