Posts Tagged ‘Beer’

Technical Aids Tips and Tricks XXVIII

Friday, January 18th, 2013

Frontpage

The medically proven positive effect of hop blossom ice tea, or disdainfully just called beer, is generally known.

“Cold wheat soup” dope

is extensively carried out, especially in Bavaria with state recognition.

If you are not able to remove the crown cap of the medicine bottle any more due to the paralysis of your hands, illness, stroke or too much doping, there is only one thing to help, the

One-arm-hop-blossom-ice-tea-bottle-opener

Source of supply of this ingenious aid without medical device number is amongst others

the company www.Mehal.de

I have already reported about their knife holder (see older blogpost).

Here is a link to other helpful special openers:

Type I bottle / jar opener

Type II bottle / jar opener

2. self-developed technical aid, my medicine bottle opener

Type I canpull opener

Type II can opener

Security advice: Too much doping can influence the driving characteristics of your wheelchair substantially.

Special thanks to Technical Aids Stuntman Ochim, who immediately volunteered to test the opener with video evidence.

Translator BL

Crazy Flash Part IX

Tuesday, September 27th, 2011

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It is often claimed that women cannot park and men cannot find the butter in the fridge!!!

I leave this theory uncommented.

After years of intensive studies of human behaviour I came to the statistic, scientifically provable result that women predominantly feel the desire for champagne and wine, whereas men, no matter from which parts of the country they are, can’t resist the temptation of a weiss beer.

The visual similarity of a

weiss beer glass with a Y chromosome

is striking.
I additionally support this theory crystal-clear with the fact that wine and champagne glasses rather resemble an X chromosome.
This evolutionary association is more than obvious.

With this irrevocable fact I strive for reference at the “Royal Swedish Academy of Sciences“ in Stockholm!

Translator BL

Back from Technical Aids Testing!

Monday, June 27th, 2011

Test reports will follow shortly.

(Deutsch) Hilfsmittel Tipps und Tricks XXVII

Friday, February 4th, 2011

Sorry, this entry is only available in Deutsch.

Sometimes you have to be lucky!

Tuesday, September 14th, 2010

Frontpage

Some days ago I made a ride on my hand cycle.
(see older blogpost, trade hand cycle off for therapy pony).

My wife accompanied me on her bicycle.
I was more than positively surprised that the city of Frankfurt eventually managed to tar the old gravel path on the river Main after centuries.

It was going downstream, the cycle was rolling and rolling…

Unfortunately there is an express highway between the bicycle path on the river and two districts of the city. Because I can’t take the pedestrian bridge with my wheelchair and wanted to go to the street fair in one of the districts I had to ride further until after perceived 20 km, probably really 3 km, there was eventually a traffic light.

I had fairly shot my bolt.

After a bratwurst and a hop blossom ice tea * my motivation for the return ride was shattered.

When I was slowly riding home, I already fancied using the tram, I coincidentally met a former colleague, let’s call him Harald, with his

Didi Thurau – Memory Bicycle.

(translator’s note: famous German road bicycle racer from the 70’s and 80’s)

We had rather the same destination.

He pushed me sitting on his bike!

Without breaks, we reached a top speed of up to
26 Km/h on the 8 km way home.

My electric wheelchair tractive Speedy-Elektro only makes
max. 6 Km/h, otherwise it would need a license plate.

If Harald should have had a license plate???

Thanks again from this side.

Comment of my wife:
I am not used to such a speed any more as I usually roll with perceived 5 km/h behind the hand cycle and my biggest sporty challenge is not to fall from the bike at this “speed”, so that today my muscles are kind of sore for the first time.

*(In a narrower sense, beer is an alcoholic and carbonated beverage which is gained by fermentation mostly from the basic ingredients water, malt and hop). (Source: Wikipedia)

Translator BL

Technical Aids Tips and Tricks XIV

Monday, July 26th, 2010

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Because of the paralysis of my legs the muscles of my thighs are flagged in such a way, i.e. flat, that they meanwhile form a quite acceptable transport table. The biggest difficulty is just to convince the legs not to drift outside when they are used as deposit for e.g. a bottle of non-alcoholic beer. The dropping rate is considerable. I am not alone with this kind of issue.
Many wheelchair drivers build a rather symbiotic relationship with their knee tray.
I have already seen a self-constructed knee tray coated with green felt, with which at night probably a game of poker is played for the small pension.
So far so good!

At the Swedes with the big yellow and blue shopping bags I have discovered an excellent

knee tray type BRÄDA (new name BYLLAN).

Officially it is a laptop knee table with mobile phone pocket on the side.

The shape nestles ergonomically against my

six-bake belly.

A non-slip reel has to be put on it still!
Safety instruction:
The BRÄDA (new name BYLLAN) is not a medical device.
No liability is assumed for falling parts.
It doesn’t have a medical device number and can’t be prescribed by the doctor. The immense acquisition costs of 14,95 € have to be completely borne by the patient and are not tax-deductible.

Translator BL

Wheeler’s pint

Tuesday, June 22nd, 2010

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Don’t drink and drive

is a matter of course for us wheelers.
A Hessian brewery has now launched the first

Wheeler’s Pint.

Non-alcoholic and isotonic

all what the body needs.

Side effects such as mocking, sneering, head-shaking and chronic taste definition search are guaranteed.
Resemblances and interactions with beer don’t have to be feared.

Isotonic: Sport drinks having the same mineral concentration like body fluids (Source Wikipedia).

Which body fluids do they mean? Yuk!!!

Translator BL

Quadriplegic Tips Part III

Friday, December 11th, 2009

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Everybody who knew me before my accident knows that I have been a rather

”spiritual” person.

In the hospital I wasn‘t able any more to open a bottle of

hop blossom ice tea

(cold beer) due to lack of power.
My colleagues had sympathy with my situation and constructed this special opener type:

ASIFLENGHTISNOTIMPORTANT!

The opener is also excellently suitable as extension for Allen wrenches if the screws on the wheelchair are lose again.

Translator BL

Tetrapack I

Wednesday, November 25th, 2009

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We quadriplegics (or: tetraplegics) name ourselves among each other “Teddies” or sometimes “Tetra Pack”. Because I am football fan of Eintracht Frankfurt I remembered that Eintracht promoted around 1995 “Tetra Pak” (translator’s note: trademark of a beverage carton) on their football shirts. These football shirts were at that time exceptionally in bright yellow.

To cut it short: I was in need for such a shirt!!!

But how do you get a more than 10 year old football shirt which was quite rare even at that time because most of the fans prefer the traditional Eintracht colours red and black. I hate it when somebody tells me what they flogged in Ebay and how they boosted the price. It’s normal, you will hear.
The Ebay results were poor.
I have then started my football shirt search in various fan forums.
The feedback was remarkable!
Unfortunately almost all offers were black-red football shirts.
Nobody told me which price they had in mind what I am usually used to!!!
I was stunned.
Should it be possible that nobody tries to rip me off this time?
It is unbelievable, but another Eintracht fan has not only given his as good as new yellow football shirt as a present to me, but didn’t even want to have the postage refunded.
His comment: I will give the football shirt to you for free if I can do you a favour with this. Regarding the money, I don’t want anything for the shirt or the postage. But maybe we meet some time at a match, then you can pay for the half-time beer :-)
I was really happy!
I had to mention it, it helps more than any of my other 12 pills.

Translator BL